Servant Leadership Series: Listening to Understand

The St. John’s Newfoundland Convention Centre had been abuzz for the past week with a national leadership forum. It was Spring 2003. The closing keynote speaker approached the stage. It was the last day of the forum and over 1,000 managers and aspiring leaders anticipated the keynote address. The keynote was to be delivered by their Champion. Mike Nurse, Assistant Deputy for Public Works and first Champion for the National Managers’ Community stepped up to the microphone. Many considered him a peer, a friend. He was an approachable, confident, convincing visionary. He spoke of right actions and how to be an effective leader. Among many other wise teachings, he said within his address that we should all strive to “…be a good listener. The best ideas I’ve ever received have always been within earshot if I shut my mouth and listen for a while.”

This is the kind of man Mike was. Say it like it is. Be willing to recognize and acknowledge one’s own limitations and the importance of letting great ideas come from the team. Such acknowledgement is a tremendous asset to an Edgewalker especially when coupled with proper listening. Without the ability to listen for the sake of learning and understanding, a leader will become a team liability. Mike spoke to his community out of experience. Listening to others was a part of his practice and it showed in the powerhouse teams he was a part of.

Mike passed away suddenly not too many months after sharing this wisdom with his community. He left a huge Mike-shaped hole. But he also left a legacy of leadership practitioners who chose to pick up where Mike left off and continue to sharpen each other’s leadership edges. In 2010, I became a part of that legacy and entered the arena as a manager-would-be-leader. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was already practicing this good idea that Mike had shared in 2003. 

During the same timeframe that Mike was this community’s Champion, I was re-entering the world of management in a new organization. My common mantra, which is still the same one I return to when introducing myself to new teams, went something like this: “I am the newest member of this team. I cannot possibly know all the good things that you know, so I need you to teach me and together we will exceed our goals.” This is the way I succeed – assuming the stance of not knowing and remaining curious. If I can assume I know nothing, then I have no choice but to seek wisdom from those around me if I “shut my mouth and listen for a while.” The result? My teams have always exceeded expectations – both mine and others in the organization.

In the same way that I do this with my teams, I also take the stance of not knowing with my clients, stakeholders and partners. I have often found myself in positions of trust as a result. Why? Because not-knowing brings about conversations that leave others feeling like they have been heard and understood. They feel engaged. I listen to understand, not to respond. This is another practice that can elude many, especially if someone has an agenda that needs to be pushed.

I have worked for organizations that expected me to push their agenda when meeting with clients and stakeholders. I would try this method for a while, but always found myself defaulting back to this stance of not knowing. I became a policy expert so that I could provide a better service to clients. I would circumvent my own organization’s policies to find the best ways to serve front-end users. I have always believed in the team effort, and I consider clients, partners and stakeholders to be a part of the team in the same way I expect those within my organization to play a part. For organizations that have an us-versus-you approach to service delivery, proves problematic for me as the guy in the middle.

According to Robert K. Greenleaf and his contemporaries,

“Leaders have traditionally been valued for their communication and decision-making skills. Although these are also important skills for the servant leader, they need to be reinforced by a deep commitment to listening intently to others. The servant leader seeks to identify the will of a group and helps to clarify that will. He or she listens receptively to what is being said and unsaid. Listening also encompasses hearing one’s own inner voice. Listening, coupled with periods of reflection, is essential to the growth and well-being of the servant leader.”[1]

Part of listening to understand is being aware of all sides of the story, including the hidden messages, and refraining from injecting my own agenda or drawing conclusions until the time is right. When I am aware of my own thoughts wondering about something, it is better to ask a question instead of sharing my own thoughts on the matter. As many facts as possible need to be uncovered, and this takes trust and time. Quite often in the course of listening to understand, the best conclusions are drawn from the person(s) sharing the information. This would not happen if I did not take the stance of “not knowing.” I typically find that I also learn from others much more effectively if I encourage them to tell the story.

Part of my own personal practice is formed out of an understanding of my inner voice and the voice of my higher power. I must become fully cognizant of both of these voices in order to remain grounded. Only out of this grounding can I be fully attentive to the words, expressions, tones and mood of a room, allowing me to be fully present and engaged in all situations. When I practice out of this grounding, I am an effective facilitator and leader for those in my care and they trust me to be this way. When trust is built, then we can begin to talk about possibilities – what lies beyond the edges.

And beyond the edges is where the Edgewalkers seek to go. Out there is our natural habitat and where we find our community.

Donovan Mutschler, MA

For more information on the content or processes included in this article contact Donovan Mutschler at donovan@edgewalkers.ca.

[1] Spears, Larry C. (2010). The Journal of Virtues and Leadership, Vol. 1 Iss. 1, 2010, p.27.: Character and Servant Leadership: Ten Characteristics of Effective, Caring Leaders.